Mayce Nanny

I started thinking about weight loss surgery in the fall of 1997. I was a newlywed, but it wasn’t going well and I was desperate to make my husband happy. When we met five years earlier I weighed about 135-40 pounds, which was a good weight for me. Since our meeting, I had steadily gained weight year by year until I reached 214 pounds. I’m not sure what it was that caused the weight gain – lack of exercise, motivation and an ongoing bout with depression were the main culprits. I tried everything from fad diets and dangerous drugs to bingeing and purging, but nothing seemed to work. When my relationship with my fiancé began going downhill, food became my new best friend. My family had always turned to food, so for me, it was a natural solution.

After gaining so much weight in just a few years, I made the decision to have weight loss surgery. My husband was slipping away and I thought I could make him happy if I was thinner. I felt I could change things between us. If he liked the way I looked, he might treat me better. He wouldn’t make cracks about my weight, I wouldn’t get my feelings hurt, and then maybe we’d get along. I wanted the surgery for him. It was the wrong reason, and thank goodness things didn’t work out at that time with the surgery…or him! I needed time to love myself again in order to have the surgery for the right reasons!

I had to wait several years to reach that point. I received my degree, started my career and was relatively happy…except for the weight. I had reached over 250 pounds and I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t exercise because the weight on my joints was excruciating, and worse, I had learned how to make food, instead of people, my comfort. My obesity had become a disease. I knew I was putting the new life I had created in jeopardy if I didn’t do something.

My mother researched available procedures, and my brother and I began to look at her findings. We found out that the school nurse for the campus where we taught had gone through the procedure in which we were interested. I wanted to talk to her about it, but I was hesitant. I kept going back and forth between, “Yes, I’m going to do this,” and “No, I could die, and fat is not worth dying for.” I finally talked to her and she pointed me in the direction of New Dimensions Weight Loss Surgery.

Once I started the process for having surgery, I was excited but also scared. I had never had more than dental surgery in my life! Even through the process and preparation for surgery, I was still going back and forth between going through with it or ducking out. I finally had a revelation. I knew that death was a risk of the surgery and I was scared, but I was absolutely terrified of living the rest of my life unhappy. I realized I was at a crossroads, and I had to decide what was most important: quantity of life or quality. My obesity was ruining my quality of life. I had closed myself off from any romantic relationships, I hardly ever went out with friends, and when I did go out, I played the role of the “fat, funny friend.” If I laughed at myself then no one else could laugh at me. The best defense is a good offense! I knew that wasn’t me. I had so much more to give to the world, and it was then that I decided that I was ready. For me! Not for a husband, not for the people around me. I was ready to do it for me.

The day of surgery was scary. I cried all the way to the hospital, but I really shouldn’t have been so afraid. The hospital staff and everyone involved were great. They put me at ease and took care of me every step of the way. My surgeon, Dr. Stegemann, was fantastic and so patient with me. I couldn’t have asked for better care. Recovery was quick and relatively painless. In fact, I was off all pain medication the day after surgery. Other than being a bit sore, I felt fine. I was released on schedule with a clean bill of health.

The first two weeks were the hardest. I realized my disease was more emotional than anything. I needed to eat to feel good, and then suddenly, my best friend (food) was gone. I spent a little time resenting those around me for being able to eat what I no longer could. Yes, I’ll admit it – I actually resented people for their hamburgers! That soon faded away….along with the pounds, and the pain in my joints when I walked, and the stigma of being obese, and the shame and hurt I’d been carrying around with me since my marriage. I’ve now lost about 105 pounds. I’ve gone from a size 22 to a size 8, and I feel fantastic!

I work out now. I love yoga, walking and swimming, and I actually have the energy to do it! I’ve also been working on more than my body. I realized going through this procedure that my problem wasn’t just physical. New Dimensions Weight Loss Surgery helped me get in contact with an excellent therapist for a few months after the surgery, and I’ve chosen to remain in therapy even after that time to continue feeling better about myself and life in general. I also have a social life now. I go out with my friends, and I’m actually dating… good guys that treat me well. It’s amazing what a little confidence will do for you!

I’ve been lucky that everyone in my life has been incredibly supportive of the surgery and proud and happy for me. Outside of my friends and family I get mixed reactions; some are happy for me, some are surprised that I was ever obese, and a few even look at me with disgust at the thought of someone ever being obese. The trick is to understand that some people just don’t understand. Then I have to remember that I didn’t have the surgery for them, I did it for me.

I had a particularly great experience with my surgery, but some people don’t have it as easy. My younger brother had minor complications, and my mother, due to a prior surgical procedure on her stomach, had more serious complications. Each of us, however, would tell you we’d do it again in a second. For each of us it was worth it. It was wonderful to experience it myself, but it was incredible to be able to share the experience with them.

Everyone has to decide for him or herself what makes you happy. In my case, this surgery helped me find what I needed to be happy. I would certainly suggest that anyone considering it be prepared for not just the physical changes, but the emotional changes as well. Everything changes inside and out. I can’t stress how much this has helped me and changed my life. I’m confident, and I like myself again. I’m not model-thin, but I never wanted to be. I just wanted to be happy, and although this surgery certainly doesn’t make life perfect, I believe it’s helped me get on the right track.